Letter 3: Open Heart & Mind

Before Reading:

I just want to say, before anything else, that if you’ve taken the time to read each of my letters up to this point—I’m truly grateful. I appreciate that you are willing to hear me out and make space for the concepts I’m sharing. If you have landed on this letter first, and haven’t read the others, I encourage you to go back to JourneyandDestiny.org and begin at Letter #1. Believe me, this will all make a lot more sense if you do!

In Letter #1, I described my background as a devout and disciplined Christian and member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. In this letter, I will describe the key principles of open-mindedness, why people reject new ideas, and what concepts sparked my interest in reevaluating my beliefs. 

I wrote this letter primarily for you–to share a path that has brought me greater joy and peace–but it can also apply to your communication with friends and family. As I describe the primary reasons people resist new ideas, you may want to use those insights to better connect with and understand those you love and care about. When doing so, however, always use love and wisdom as you guide. Remember: relationships should always be valued over religious opinions. The goal is to love and understand each other better, not to FORCE our beliefs on others. 

Barriers to Spiritual Growth:

So what holds people back from true spiritual development and exploration?

It’s rarely a lack of intelligence or sincerity. More often, it’s an internal resistance—deep-rooted fears, subconscious conditioning, and pride—that creates a protective wall around existing beliefs. These barriers don’t just block falsehood; they also unintentionally block growth, clarity, and truth seeking too.

In many cases, fear is the primary barrier that keeps someone from being open to new ideas and perspectives.

• Fear of damnation / fear of doing something wrong
  Fear of being “tempted” by false information

• Fear of change

• Fear of judgment or criticism from those in your circle \

• Fear of being wrong 

• And fear of the unknown

Ego and pride can also play a role in one’s resistance to considering new views. 

Such thoughts might include:

• “I already know the truth. I don’t need to hear anything else.”

Or 

• “That person is clearly living unrighteously. They can’t possibly know the truth.”
  

Oftentimes, such reactions of fear or pride are not signs of spiritual strength, but of fragility. Someone who is truly grounded in what they believe will not respond to differing ideas with aggression, defensiveness, or avoidance. Instead, they will listen—confident that the truth can withstand examination. If you stand on solid ground, you have nothing to fear in hearing a different perspective. Remember: truth doesn’t require protection—it can hold its own.

Principles of Open Mindedness:

I’ll admit, before last year, I was pretty obstinate and close minded. I was convinced that every story in the Bible was true and no humans lived before Adam etc.. My mentality was: “do as I’m told and don’t try to make sense of it.” After all, who are we to question the word of God? Or so I thought…

In that state of mind, I wasn’t able to hear alternate perspectives, and so getting to the point of being able to hear, required significant maturity and growth. 

If you're going to truly explore your beliefs, and I mean really allow yourself to learn, grow, and even question without fear, you will need a few specific mindsets. I say this not from theory, but from experience. These are the foundations that made it possible for me to grow spiritually without crisis.

1. You have to take personal ownership of your beliefs.
   Even if your faith is founded on the scriptures, prophecy, or a tradition you deeply respect, it cannot stay secondhand. You have to make it your own. If you believe something only because you were told to, you'll always be afraid of losing it–a sign your testimony is weak. Instead, choose to believe what you believe because you have clear, observable, and personal reasons to. And if you’re unsure? Explore it until you develop an unwavering knowledge for yourself. Allow the truth to prevail.
   

2. You have to value principles above specifics.
   This shift was subtle for me, but it changed everything. Rather than blindly accepting every teaching, as I got older, I started asking if specific teachings aligned with the core principles I knew to be true and good. Love. Order. Truth. Peace. When those principles became my north star, I could analyze other teachings effectively without getting lost.
   

3. You have to value observable truth more than mysticism.
   It’s easy to get swept up in abstract language, doctrines, or mystical speculation, but real faith shows up in reality. Does it bring peace? Does it produce good fruit? Does it hold up when applied, or does it fall apart under pressure? Faith isn’t meant to be vague. It’s meant to work. And when it does, you know it’s real.
   

4. You have to be brave enough to question. You have to be a truth seeker.
   Open-mindedness isn't simply a personality trait. It's an act of courage. You have to be willing to investigate your beliefs honestly—not because you want to destroy them, but because you trust that truth holds up under pressure. If a doctrine is real, it won't crumble. And if it does crumble, then you're on the path to discovering truth.

So while reading these letters or discussing spiritual ideas with others, I encourage you to be willing to question. Be willing to feel uncomfortable. And most importantly, be willing to listen—both to your inner self and others.

The Tipping Point 

Although having an open mind is critical for spiritual growth, sometimes our ability to hear new ideas is more a matter of the right wording at the right time from the right person. This was true for me. 

See, I thought I knew everything I needed to know about life and salvation and I wasn’t really interested in exploring new ideas. Although I had heard similar messages from others before, they had never been presented in a way that spoke to my heart. That is until the following thoughts–shared under the right conditions–piqued my curiosity and inspired me to learn more. 

They were shared gently, but with confidence, which added a sort of thought provoking element of mystery. The first four came from others and the fifth from my own heart. 

I encourage you to read them slowly and give yourself a chance to pause and listen. 

1. Is God’s power, love, or privilege really limited by location, gender, nationality, or path—or are we creating those limits?

2. Which is a more important judge of spirituality (assuming mutual exclusivity)? Integrity and a loving heart or external religious qualifiers (service, tithing, activity, etc.)? Why does religion seem to value the second?

3. Does the church prioritize personal enlightenment or institutional control? Is the focus increasing internal spiritual connectedness for all humans or external obedience and institutional growth? 

4. What has my religion actually produced in my life or the lives of other members—peace, joy, and growth... or anxiety, guilt, and performance? If a religion has the “whole truth and nothing but the truth” is it undeniably evident in the health, joy, and abundance of their lives?

5. Finally, if stillness, acceptance, and connection with the earth are innately divine—why do so many religions fail to teach these principles? Why are ecological conscientiousness, sustainability, and caring for the earth ignored altogether? 

To me, these questions felt both valid and important. They weren’t rebellious or skeptical—they were honest. And for the first time, I truly wanted to understand. Though the next year of study would lead to many more questions, these were the concepts that opened the door.

Although I had spent decades studying the gospel and religion, I didn’t have clear answers to these questions and that bothered me. They were valid points that I knew I needed to make peace with one way or another. 

But One Thing First….

But before stepping into the dangerous realm of what many label as “apostasy” (a.k.a spiritual exploration), I decided to take one more step to double check my headspace and heart. 

I would encourage you to do something similar. 

Rather than acting on skepticism and frustration, I decided to carefully plan and prepare to bring my questions to God in the best way I knew how.

Now, if you don’t know, members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints consider temples to be the most sacred place of worship–a place where one can receive answers and connect with God in a deeper way. Temples are also regarded as being free from the distractions of the world, especially for those who meet the conditions of worthiness as I did. Because of that, I felt it would be the ideal place where I could receive clear answers or correct any misalignment, so I planned a trip.

Once there, in a quiet and reverent state, I brought my concerns to the Lord. I offered a humble prayer asking God to  either a) reaffirm my testimony or b) show me any truths or lies I had been blind to. In short, I got my answer: a clear one. Opening the scriptures next to me, I was shown two very problematic scriptures that gave me further confidence to pursue answers. (I’ll address the specifics of those verses in a letter later on.)

With that, I finally had the confidence and confirmation I needed to begin seeking—truly seeking. Not to prove or disprove anything, but to follow truth wherever it would lead. Again, I encourage you to take time to do the same. If you haven’t, and until you do, you won’t be able to understand the following letters. 

Your spiritual enlightenment is up to you. You have to be in the right frame of mind to go deeper than you have before. 

Be ready to listen to your heart, 

Be ready to acknowledge doubt. 

Be ready to seek new answers. 

In the letters that follow, I’ll begin to unpack these questions and the answers I’ve found. 

I hope you will continue on with me!

Sincerely With Love,

Heather N.